My sister had both ADHD and autism. We think she may have aspergers also because she is generally very social able. Anyway, my sister seems to have a meltdown every single night and she doesn’t listen to anything i say. Even though she is 11, she has the mind of an 7/8 year old.
She is;
EXTREMELY talkative- She literally doesn’t shut up, honestly. Once at my grandmothers funeral she kept talking and shouting when there was a moment of silence. It was horrible. I feel she, i don’t want to say ruin because that’s selfish but she does ruin my moments, my life is very difficult.
She also keeps telling everyone my private Business. As a 15 year old girl, i do not want random people to know my Business. She doesn’t seem to listen when i ask her to stop and it makes me very frustrated. When she is with me, people don’t want to be around her and then don’t want to be around me because she is there. Yes that is mean, but i can also see why they would.
She won’t listen- AT ALL. she does not listen to anything so when she asks questions and we have answered she keeps repeating and repeating and it becomes very irritating.
She can be fine some days when she has her medication but other days she is out control, and because she doesn’t/can’t listen, it’s very hard to control her.
Quite frefrequentlye has been having serious tantrums at the night time. Especially when she wants something and is told no or she can’t have it. She progresses into the uncontrollable tantrums and works herself up.
I find it extextremelyfdifficult be in the same room as her and as a quite person, she is very hard to handle.
My mother and father keep her in line most of the time but when she can’t have what she wants or patterns and plans change she goes into a meltdown. They work very hard to keep her calm. It’s also becoming harder because she is becoming a teenager and is going into highigh schoollso as her friends are maturing she is becoming more and more immature.
I am in my GCSE year and can’t afford to worry about every time my sister has a meltdown because it affects me deeply. I just wish she could listen and understand. Please help me find ways to look past this.
Loading ...
HOW? would you feel if the boot was on tbe other foot????
The National Autistic Society or some such organisation should be able to offer support. You do need time without your sister; you’re not being selfish or mean, but I can see why you feel guilty for thinking “such things of your sister”. People with special needs like hers are very draining, you can’t be expected to be around her 24/7; you’re too young to be responsible for her anyway, at least for long periods of time. Have a chat with your parents and try to come up with a compromise, say, you can go out with your friends and leave your sister at home on Friday evenings, in return for looking after her on Saturday evenings (so your parents can have some time out too), or for doing some jobs around the house. Explain the difficulty with your homework as well, as you do need to concentrate on your exams; if all else fails, could you stay an extra half-hour or so after school to catch up, or go to a friend’s house where it’s quieter?
This is what autistic children are like.
My little brother is autistic, and he constantly talks about computers, night and day no matter whether people are getting bored of it or not. It is hard to cope with, but its not something thats going to go away over night. There are ways of dealing with it. Remember shes a human being too, and whether she annoys or embarrasses you, you have to get used to it and support her. It is a hard condition for people to cope with, but just keep in mind that people with autism don’t see things the way we do.
There are things you can do though. Take some time out to research the condition, and there are coping mechanisms for family members. There are also groups and associations you can turn to for advice and support.
Good luck x
There are a couple of issues here. First, your parents need to realise that just because your sister is autistic doesn’t mean she shouldn’t be disciplined. She needs rules more than you do. Autistic children respond well to rules, but there have to be consequences for breaking the rules applied every time. Not only would this make life easier for everyone in the home, it would also make your sister happier.
Second, your parents need to enable you to spend time away from your sister. This needs to be a family priority.
I have brought up three children, two of whom are autistic. I always tried really hard to find ways where my middle child (the ‘normal’ one) could get away and have a normal life without his siblings. Meltdowns were not allowed in our house. Any meltdown had severe consequences, e.g. not pudding for a week. Believe me, having to sit at the table and watch the rest of the family eat pudding in front of them very quickly cured any thoughts of meltdowns! I also often just didn’t go to places I knew could be troublesome,. e.g. at the first sign of trouble at the funeral I would have taken my children home – but they would have had severe consequences, e.g. the confiscation of a favourite game. Any arguments and another punishment would immediately be added.
I know how hard this is for your parents, but they need to be reminded that your needs are just as important, in fact, I would say more important.