Wednesday morning, a girl who was in band with me, her sister (alumni for the band) and their parents were killed in a fire. Thursday, my best friends promised me that they’d be at the candle light service at the school…none of them showed up. They also said they’d be at the funeral today…again..no one showed. This has been a very tough week. I broke down and cried on my band director’s shoulder at the funeral because I couldn’t stand the thought of that whole family being dead and in boxes. I have also realized that I have lost quite a few friends this year. One of them, I have been there for through everything she has delt with. But now that she has some boyfriend, she barely even talks to me. She was one that promised that she’d be at the candle light service, but didn’t show. Every time I try to make plans with my friends, they all cancel on me. Even on my birthday. I also have a boyfriend, but I always put them before him. I have my band friends, but I miss my old friends too. My band friends are like my brothers and sisters. We all gathered at the school hours after we found out that our friend/sister had died. I don’t know what to do anymore. Should I try to talk to my old friends? or should I just fully convert to only the friends that I KNOW will be there, as I’ve learned with the death of my friend and her family?
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Situation proves who is there and who isn’t. Go with who is there and phase out those who isn’t.
I think you should stick with the friends who you can trust and who will stand by you when you’re going through a tough time. And if they try to approach you, you should let them know how you felt when they didn’t make an effort to comfort you or give you any words of wisdom about coping with a loss.